When it comes to the nearest and dearest to our hearts, we put in all our efforts to make sure everything between us is going well, and we go all the extra mile to fix whatever is broken in our relationships with them. But most importantly, what does your relationship with yourself look like? How do you treat or think about yourself? Do you fail to forgive yourself when you forgive others in a blink? Do you show yourself empathy just as you would do for others? For how long have you been abandoning yourself?
When we come to mention the word ‘relationship’ we automatically think of our interactions with someone else, when in fact, the most important relationship is the one that we have with ourselves. The relationship we have with ourselves dictates the quality of life we have, simply because we cannot make good decisions for ourselves, accept ourselves for who we are, or treat ourselves with the kindness we deserve if we are not in a healthy relationship with ourselves.
Fixing your relationship with yourself is a journey of healing, and when you heal, you come to terms with things around you that you weren’t at peace with. You change your perspective from one that is triggered by anger and disappointment to a better judgement based on tolerance, forgiveness, and peace. But to reach there, start with yourself.
Be your own good friend. Don’t turn into becoming your own worst enemy with negative self-talk, constant self-criticism, and blaming. Be that compassionate, empathetic, tolerant person you are with those you love, but now start with yourself first. You owe yourself some more love and kindness.
Look for the good in you. Remind yourself of your best qualities, no matter what it is. Think of all the traits and things people praise and compliment you for and remind yourself of them. Think of the times you did an act of kindness that changed someone’s life, think of the times you made someone else’s day brighter; or the times when you were able to get up on your feet after life has knocked you down; you will come to realize there are so many great things about you. Take the time to reflect and to learn more about yourself, to get to know yourself better, and to love yourself more.
Don’t be too hard on yourself. Don’t beat yourself up over the opportunities you missed out on, they were simply not meant for you. Forgive yourself for the past mistakes and the wrong choices you made, they were all necessary for you to grow; this is part of the learning process.
Allow yourself a breakdown. This uncomfortable, weary, and overwhelming feeling of breaking down can be a blessing in disguise. It is how you reset your emotional state, letting out all those negative emotions you have been bottling up. In a breakdown, you set yourself free from every pain holding you back. From time to time, you need this cry out, you need this breakdown; you are not weak. Don’t judge yourself for it.
Finally, today, every day is a call for you to come back to yourself again, to make time for yourself, to find joy and inner peace again. It is time to feel happy in your own company instead of running away from it, to accept yourself for who you are, and to look after your needs. Trust me, this will be one of your best investments: your relationship with ‘you’.
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